Click on each photo for a full-size image.
Yes, there are way too many photos (I actually took even more!). But it was such a bizarre event (but not in a bad way), that I thought I'd include lots of images to give you something of an idea as to what was actually involved: lots of time, driving, and meat. And so lots of photos... If you think it's tough viewing 47 images of smoke meat, imagine spending a day TAKING them! Oh, and is it "smoked meat", or "smoke meat"? Grammatically speaking, probably "smoked". But since we're here in Montreal, I'm voting for "smoke".
| Schwartz's |
For me, Schwartz's is smoked meat. |
VivreManger & poutine await Kenk |
Now this is what a deli should look like. Crowded, functional, full of great smells and sounds and sights. And plenty of Eastern European accents. |
Smoked meat, pickles, mustard & slaw. Absolutely top-rate meat here. Look how nice and dark it is. But hey, where's the rye?!? |
Now that's a smoke meat plate! The best smoke meat anywhere in my opinion. Not too wet or dry, real smoke flavour, nice and spicy, great texture and just the right amount and distribution of fat. A person could live on this (before he dies of heart disease). |
There's the rye. Nice size sandwiches -- not small, but not so large that they're completely impossible to eat or falling apart all over the place. Great pickles and fries here too. |
Ah, now that's a proper deli counter. Still early in the morning, so it's just starting to fill up (which it most certainly did by the time we left). |
And there it is: the Schwart'z lineup. And it's worth it. |
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| The Main |
Directly across the street from Schwart's? The Main. big red fancy shmancy neon sign. They need it. |
But first, let's walk around a bit to cleanse the palate. Or gut. Or whatever. From left to right: VivreManger, poutine, Kenk. |
Lots of cool little places in this area. Well it is one of Montreal's cool areas after all. What the heck is this place? |
Oh, Chilean food. Looks interesting. Another time... It's freezing and windy and snowy out here -- let's go eat more meat. |
Okay, here we are inside The Main. Deli-looking enough, but seriously quiet. Graveyard quiet. Shudder... |
The panel at work. |
What the heck is that watery pinkish stuff? Where's the smoke meat? Enough of this place -- let's bust outta here Starsky. |
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| Snowdon Deli |
Yes, that's snow. A Jewish deli in a Jewish part of town. Quite busy already with a lineup to get a table. |
Yep, it's a deli alright. Lots of families. Cool scene (well, cool in the deli sort of way, you know?) |
Our man VivreManger digs in. That's eggplant on the table. Now, I really love eggplant, but this stuff was pretty gooey and bland. But I still ate it. |
Kenk, not to be outdone. I'm starting to feel like I'm in a Woody Allen movie. Note the drink: black cherry cola. Nobody drinks that stuff except for anyone who eats smoke meat in Montreal. I have no idea how it got started, but if you eat smoke meat you gotta drink black cherry. |
Now is that a work of art, or what? We dissect it for you, the smoke meat-less masses. |
Extreme closeup: Good God, that's way too many meat pixels. |
Here's where the deed is done. Slicing away. |
Hey kid, we're trying to work here. |
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| George's |
Yes, it's in one of those suburban mini strip-malls. |
And here it is. Apparently George worked for many years at Schwartz's. |
The ubiquitous window-of-meats. Your window to success in "low-carb" delight: eat one of these a day. |
And here's the man himself! (George) |
Hmmm... I don't know, I'm thinking of having the, uh, smoke meat. You? |
Yeah, okay, I guess we'll have smoke meat, thanks. |
That's a whack o' fat. |
I'll just take a handful of those spices, thanks. I'm just asking for the end piece with all those spices in a big bowl next time. Oh, and vat of mustard. And a gross of Lipitor. |
Sliced by hand of course. The way it should be. |
I bet this young guy's red hands have already sliced quite a bit of smoke meat in their time. |
Extreme closeup. The horror, the horror. |
In case you might have missed something in the shot above. |
Consulting with George. It's amazing how showing up in a restaurant with still and video cameras brings out the management... |
There was a "microbrewery" beer listed. We tried it. It stunk. |
Boy do I love pickled peppers. And don't you just love the red formica tables? Red formica is a definite decorative element at George's. The meat on the other hand was pretty bland (not spicy enough for me). |
A little something to help clear a path in the arteries before the next round of cholesterol hits. |
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| Abie's |
Hey, another suburban mini-mall just off the strip. Abie is apparently yet another Schwartz's alumnus. |
Okay, it's deli-ish, but a bit too airy and sterile for my tastes. But I bet it's nicer when it's busy. |
More hand slicing. |
Did I mention that they hand-slice smoke meat in these parts? VivreManger particularly wanted me to get these shots. |
And the results of all that hand-slicing. Pretty good, but again, a bit light on the spicing. Interestingly enough, they make their own slaw here too (yum, I love real slaw -- that's WITHOUT mayo), but they have a large vat of fluorescent industrial junk because our lovely redhead waitress told us that's what people have simply come to expect and so order it more. |
What's that? The one above wasn't close enough. Okay, here's another Extreme Meat Closeup™ for you then. |
VivreManger savours the vintage and takes notes.
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Your intrepid Marathoners. From left: VivreManger, Paul (me), poutine, Kenk. |
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| The End. |
NiMH batteries
